Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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