If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
