You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
