My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Randomize
