Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
