He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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