its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
