guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Randomize
