But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
