i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
