Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(256): View more from Alabama

Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.

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(815): View more from Illinois

I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating

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(402): View more from Nebraska

In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...

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(503): View more from Oregon

I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world

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(309): View more from Illinois

Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding

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(360): View more from Washington

I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.

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