what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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