I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
