so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
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