I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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