I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
