just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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