i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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