How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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