there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He did a backflip because drugs
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