Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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