I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize