Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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