just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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