is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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