you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I would fuck him just for his dog
Randomize
