Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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