awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
