Im at strip club and am horny
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
