The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
