I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize