You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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