I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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