I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize
