but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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