He disabled his match.com account in front of me
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
