Buhtt sex?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
