it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
