You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
