the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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