Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
