I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
