How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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