community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
