ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
