omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
