found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
