Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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