If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
