i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
